Emotions

   I'm a bit confused. Recently my mood has been great, wonderful almost. It's strange I haven't felt like this in over three or fours years. I don't understand why. Although it's not like I'm constantly happy or something, no I'm content. Which is strange I haven't been content in god knows how long. I should be happy about this, but I can't, because I don't understand why.
   I can't help, but feel like I'm waiting for the next shoe to drop. Monday was great, fun even which is strange for me cause it was a monday and I had school. I don't like school, in fact my dad rarely asks how was school since I always give the same answer- boring. Now I'm constantly waiting for the shoe to drop. Something terrible is going to happen and someone or something is apologizing in advance. Which is never a good sign. I just have so many questions! Today didn't help much either.
   I was finishing gym when my gym teacher calls out to me then says a few sentences, I can't remember what at the moment, then tells me I have a mystic face or something similar. After that interaction I'm trying to understand what the hell he meant by that. I have a mystic face, what in Tom's name is that suppose to mean?
   So during my break I took it apart. You see, I am not a fan of gym. I'm pretty sure I'm on the verge of hating it, but I'm not sure. Because of this I tend to not be in the best mood during that period, so my expression is neutral, bored or the occasional amused one when my classmates do something silly.
    Is that what he meant? Could he be talking about my faces, or is he talking about the control on my emotions. I'm not really sure and I have close to no clue. I mean it's not like I'm bringing the class done because I'm not athletic, I'm fairly average in that department, so it can't be that. He know's I train outside of school, so maybe he finds it funny that I'm terrible at team related sports? It's not my fault I can't act like myself during gym.
   I'm shy, but can put up a brave front when needed. Although if people look closely at my hands they would notice their shaking or trembling. I have bad social skills alright sir? Is there something wrong with me? Maybe I'm just different from most of the girls he has to teach, because when it comes to gym girls tend to fall into two categories- the ones who like sports and the ones that don't. I'm kinda in the middle, because I like sports I wouldn't train otherwise, but I don't like team sports.
   I just don't understand my teacher. Did he say that to cause me trouble, to irritate me. Is it a hint that he wishes for me to change my behavior in his class, be more enthusiastic or something. Or maybe, just maybe it was an actual compliment and I should stop looking into it. It could be anyone of those things and at this time I wish I had a better memory of the conversation, but I don't. So I shall stop analyzing it here and move on with my life. Maybe I'll keep it in the back of my mind and watch out for my teacher from now. I could be irritating him with my attitude, but it's not like I cause him trouble. I'm on time to class, I attend regularly and don't complain.
   This is just causing me a headache. I think I'm done, so I'm not going to look into it anymore, but still the question remains- why?

Maybe I'll see you around.