'Pep talk'

    Well this is new. I think looking at the cliffs edge just a few meters away from my willow. There are so many new changes in my mind space recently, it's worrying but I guess it means I'm changing. Guess it's to be expected with were I am in life right now.
    I sigh and take a seat on the edge, allowing my feet to dangle off. It's exhilarating and the only reason I'm not afraid is because I know that the only way I'll fall into the abyss is if I jump myself. Knowing me if I ever jump that will be the death of this mind and most likely the death of my body as well. There's still time though, not a lot but plenty, this is mostly here as a reminder I guess, maybe temptation?
    You could serve many functions, just like the globe room that I've been avoiding, the willow tree that stores memories and the lake that stores loved ones. Everything serves a purpous here, now what's yours? I could stare at the light grey jutting rock for an endless amount of time, but it'd never outright tell me. That's just the way my mind works.
    Sighing I continue staring into the dark depths, wondering if I can convince some of the fireflies to fly farther from the tree so that there's some light over here. Then again there are fewer and fewer of them each time I come here, best to just let the little guys stay near the tree.
    It's easy to curl up and just space out here, so much easier to relax in here than out there. "It's because in here you block out everything." What? Who's that? I say aloud wondering how there could be anybody here.
    There's silence and I only see a dark green human like silhouette climb out from in front of me, scaring the ever living crap out of me. "Please, don't be such a wuss. It's not like you can come to harm here."
    You and I both know that's not true. I reply, glaring at the shadow.
    "So touchy," It seams to smile, "guess I'll push some more buttons."
    You're a fragment of me, aren't you I ask.
    "Pretty much, I'm that laid back persona you tend to put on whenever you're at Uni or with strangers." I nod in understanding, guess I used it so much it came to life here.
    So what brings you here? I ask casually trying to force myself to uncurl myself from around my knees, but unable to. This shadow made me uncomfortable even if I knew it was a part of me.
    "What brings me here?" It seems to perk up and smile evily, "Well this here is a kick your ass into gear talk!" It raises it's hands and does this happy dance.
What? The hell is this dude talking about?
    "First of all, thank you for calling me dude and not it, yes I can hear the things you keep to yourself, thirdly yes this is one of those stupid ass motivational speeches that so many fictional characters get when they're feeling down." They exclaim finishing by putting their hands on their hips. "Now get up and stop being a fucking whiny bitch. We are all sick of it, except for that one bro, but he thrives on your depressed stuck in place shit."
    I can only look on confused wondering what the fuck was going on.
    "Get up." I stand slowly still confused, but soon I'm falling flat on my ass with a stinging cheek. "There that ought to help a bit." They say looking down on me again.
     "Get your head out of that place. This isn't a fucking movie, book or tv show. No one is going to tell you to get your head out of your ass and press the play button. 
    You wanted to be there and by pure dumb luck you got in, now what are you going to just drop out, because you're unsure again, because it's tougher and you're tired. Well listen here asshat cause I don't want to fucking repeat myself. 
    That place, you should finish that. In orcer to do that you need to work hard and study and sometimes take the initiative. Ya, I know that all sounds scary, but you're already slowly starting to do so, this talk here, ya this is just a bit of a push.
    Alright maybe it's more of a shove and a good kick in the ass, but you get the point I hope." They look straight at me and I can feel myself burning, still unsure.
The green shadow sighs and kneels so we're at eye level.
   "Listen here kid, you can do this. You can finish that school, we all know you can, but it will take a bit of work and sweat. You'll be depressed, because you're not the fastest learner and you are a bit of an outcast, but hang in there. Cause all of us believe in you, even if no one else out there does."
    They  bonk me on the head before standing and heading towards the edge. "That will be the conclusion of this little talk. I hope you remember my words, cause I don't feel like coming back up here again. I better not have to." They finish and I could swear they glare at me before jumping down.
    That was so very strange. I slowly stand and make my way over the edge, looking down I still see darkness. Now though I know what's down there and it makes me want to avoid it all the more.
    I sigh, damn now I really have to try if even my own mind is saying I'm not worthless. And that was my laid back persona? I can't help but snort, before deciding to leave.